Tale of the Tape

Good evening folks. 

Stocks closed mixed with the Dow and S&P 500 down 0.78% and 0.22% respectively and the tech heavy Nasdaq up 0.68%.

The S&P 500 gained 7% for the month of August and is now up almost 10% YTD. Not bad given we were just down 30% YTD on March 23rd. 

2020 has been an epic comeback story for stocks reminiscent of the 1969 Mets who went 44-17 in August and September, while the Cubs fell apart, to capture the NL East and then went on to win the World Series in 5 games vs the Orioles of Baltimore. 

Amazin’ 😉

Speaking of the Mets, it looks like hedge fund titan Steve Cohen may be the last man standing in the bid to buy the team. See more deets below.

The big story today was the Apple and Tesla stock splits. Both stocks traded strong and $TSLA was especially silly up over 12% on the day. It’s becoming clear that Elon will have to colonize Mars sooner as he is quickly running out of places to stash all that cash 😉

Here’s a look at today’s closing prices for the major equity indices:

S&P 5003,500-0.22%
Russell 20001,561-1.04%
Dow Jones28,430-0.78%

Zoom Earnings

Zoom reported second quarter earnings today after the close. 

The work from home beneficiary saw 450% YoY customer growth and net income increase from $21M to $277M. Incredible.

Here are the numbers:

EPS: $0.92 vs $0.45 est.
Revenue: $663.5M (+355.0% Y/Y)

$ZM was up 25% after-hours

Monthly Charts

August 2020 is in the books. 

Here are a few monthly charts for your viewing pleasure.

S&P 500, $SPX

Nasdaq 100 ETF, $QQQ

Russell 2000 ETF, $IWM

Apple, $AAPL

Tesla, $TSLA

Lumber futures, $LB_F


The Tesla and Apple stock splits took effect today and both stocks rallied with the lower share prices to close at all-time highs.

$AAPL split 4 for 1 and traded up 3.4% to close at $129 while $TSLA split 5 for 1 and traded up a whopping 12.5% to close at $498. 

$TSLA split 5 for 1 and the stock still closed today above the $420 Funding Secured level. It’s Bizonkers.

Some think this whole thing is crazy given the seemingly unhinged moves we’re getting from these stocks and others (See Zoom above) but really it doesn’t matter whether it’s crazy or not.

It’s just reality. The stocks are going higher. They don’t care about the PE Ratio or what the man says on the financial television or what you think for that matter.

Buffett’s Bet

Warren Buffett’s Berkshire Hathaway bought stakes in five Japanese companies.

Berkshire’s 5% stakes in Mitsubishi Corp., Mitsui & Co., Sumitomo Corp., Itochu Corp. and Marubeni Corp. are valued at roughly $6 billion. 

This is the same guy who said, 

Never, ever bet against America.

Now Buffett is buying Japan. Should America be worried? Place your bets… 

Oh Canada 

Canada agreed to buy millions of doses of Novavax and Johnson & Johnson’s potential COVID vaccine.

This follows deals with Pfizer and Moderna only a few weeks ago

Novavax earmarked 76M doses and Johnson & Johnson 38M doses for Canada. Here’s what Prime Minister Trudeau said regarding the agreement,

It is possible that there is a breakthrough soon that will allow us to get a vaccine more quickly, but we don’t know where or if that breakthrough will come. That’s why the government of Canada has moved forward on signing agreements with a broad range of vaccine developers.

Here’s Reuters with more. 

🍎 Steven Cohen For the NY Mets

It’s looking like lifelong Mets fan, Steven Cohen, will achieve his dream of owning the New York Mets despite recent bidding wars with others including J-LO and boytoy A-Rod. 

The billionaire hedge-fund manager was granted an exclusive bid with the Wilpons, the team’s current owners. After hearing this, J-Rod, David Blitzer, and Josh Harris all backed out, giving Steven a clear shot at negotiations. 

Let’s face it, there’s loaded and then there’s LOADED.

J-Lo tweeted “Alex and I are so disappointed!! We worked so hard the past 6 months with the dream of becoming the first minority couple and the first woman owner to buy her father’s favorite Major League Baseball team with her own hard earned money. We still haven’t given up!” 

Things aren’t looking up for J-Rod, though.

Cohen’s exclusive bid will likely reach a deal soon, and there’s no evidence that his guilty plea to insider trading in 2013 will affect his possible Mets ownership status. Water under the bridge.

We love the deal. Cohen is a hometown boy, he’s brilliant, a ruthless competitor, and he has the funds to pay up for talent. So NYC. ❤️🗽

Earnings This Week

Be sure to know when your stocks report earnings. Here’s the full earnings calendar.

Links That Don’t Suck

🌌 Stocktwits After-Hours: Buffett Is Buying Foreign Assets

✈️ Amazon’s Drone Delivery Fleet Hits Milestone With FAA Clearance

💰 Lionel Messi skips Barcelona medical as La Liga says €700m clause must be paid

🎵 TikTok has chosen a US bidder to buy the company, sources say

🏠 A Robert A.M. Stern-Designed Home on the Massachusetts Coast Asks $18.9 Million

🏊Ten architect-designed swimming pools for cooling off at home

🏆 N.B.A. Brings Flash to E-Sports, but Can It Hold On to Its Viewers?

🏀 John Thompson death: Georgetown coach was NCAA pioneer